Romantic Comedies; Do They Inflict False Hope?

Grace Smith
ENG255F
Professor Sinowitz
12 May 2020


                                                    Romantic Comedies; Do They Inflict False Hope?

            The Proposal, 13 Going on 30, She’s the Man, literally any Hallmark movie, are all films I grew up with that sparked my original interest in romantic comedies. They gave me nothing more than hope that someday I’ll find love. Five months later as the semester comes towards an end, I look back to see how my opinion of romantic comedies has changed and how I’ll never be able to watch romantic comedies the same way I used to watch them prior to taking this course. The gene have so many more elements than just simply showing two people falling in love. This genre is ever- so changing because tends to follow along with societal changes giving a larger meaning. Romantic comedies are complexing, and their purpose isn’t necessarily crystal clear. Even though this course has allowed me to develop a deeper understanding of the genre, I am still conflicted on the impact this genre leaves the audiences. As previously questioned by Tamar Jeffers McDonald, are romantic comedies good for our culture? Or do they cause damage and inflict false hope with their unrealistic fantasies?

            There’s no doubt that these movies make us feel certain emotions about love. This genre gives me expectations on how I want to fall in love. I mean who wouldn’t want the perfect story tale romance that always ends in a happily ever after? The question that complexes me is whether these fairy tale endings are good for the soul or whether they are detrimental to reality, causing false hope. To me, its scary to think that love isn’t what Hollywood makes it seem like because, like most, we want to believe that love is as magical as it seems, and we definitely don’t want to settle for anything less.

            In McDonald’s book, Romantic Comedies, she brings up the question on whether this genre creates a positive or negative effect on the audience members: “In giving the audience a high degree of closure with the happy endings in films of this genre, are romantic comedies benign, supplying an on-screen fantasy of perpetual bliss usually lacking in real life?  Or do they negatively promote daydreams, making audiences long for a perfection which can, realistically, never be accomplished, leaving people dissatisfied with themselves and the relationships they do have?” (McDonald,14). In other words, McDonald is debating whether the genre provides perpetual bliss, or do they provide leave the audience dissatisfied with their own lives because of unrealistic fantasies. What’s so conflicting about the question McDonald poses is that there isn’t a definitive answer. I feel it’s hard to argue one side or the other because I can see it both ways. In order to understand both sides of the argument we have to take a deeper look into what each side consists of.

Love at First Sight; Is it Practical?

            A question that’s been raised throughout this course is the practicality of love at first sight. It has been ingrained into our minds that true love is love at first sight and anything shy from that may not actually be love. Is love at first sight actually attainable? Can one actually fall in love with someone without knowing who they are? Romantic comedies don’t hesitate when it comes to love at first sight. How could we possibly forget how in Four Weddings and a Funeral, Charles fell in love when he first set eyes on Carrie? Even we as the audience barley know anything about her and neither does Charles. However, despite being from different countries, they kept accidentally running into each other. Charles literally walked out on his own wedding to be with Carrie, a woman he hardly knows, but we as the audience are left feeling content because its to be interpreted as happily ever after because they were meant to be. Personally, I do not believe love at first sight, and I’m very curious to see who does these days. To be very blunt, the person I’ve been dating for the past 6 years was definitely not love at first sight; at first, I couldn’t stand him, and he probably couldn’t stand me either. However, its normal for romantic comedies to shape the genre into believing that this is the first step in falling in love. It gives the audience a false sense of hope because it’s just a fantasy which causes us to long for something that may not be attainable. 

Forgiveness; Is a Relationship Always Fixable?

Another question that has been raised is the practicality of forgiveness, and how it’s always granted no matter the circumstances. How practical is it to believe that no matter what you do in your relationship, your partner is always going to forgive you and you’ll still be able to live happily ever after? In the films we focused on, most times it’s presented in women forgiveness. After the “boy loses girl” the only option for the film to be a romantic comedy is if the boy gets the girl back, and in order to do that the girl must forgive the boy. As we’ve seen throughout this course, there are some crazy examples of woman forgiveness. Starting from the very beginning, in Much Ado About Nothing. Hero was falsely accused of cheating on her soon to be husband (this too was another relationship based on love at first sight), and his response was to utterly embarrass her at the alter in front of her whole town, essentially ruining her reputation causing her to fake her own death. How does she forgive him? By forgiving him while faking her identity and remarrying him so they can live happily ever after. I mean maybe I’m a little petty but if someone ever did that to me there is no way I would forgive them. Even in The Graduate, Diane and Benjamin end up together even though Benjamin slept with Diane’s mother. She still forgave him and walked out the alter of her wedding to runaway with Ben. Hollywood makes it seem like it’s normal for people to just walk out on their own wedding. We’ve seen quite a few examples of people leaving their current relationship/wedding to be with the other main character, and every single time it gives me anxiety. I just don’t understand how it can be that easy to walk out on someone you obviously care about. Similar in Love and Basketball, we all wanted Quincy and Monica to end up together, but it doesn’t stop me from stressing out because he left his fiancé two weeks before their wedding and there’s no sense of guilt that he feels. I question if whether or not every relationship is worth saving, but in the eyes of Hollywood, it’s always attainable to save a relationship no matter the situation.

However, I must point out that not all romantic comedies abide by Hollywood’s use of unrealistic fantasies. The fantasy of the happily ever after doesn’t apply in Roman Holiday. Out of all of the films we have watched this one for sure ends differently. During the end scene of Roman Holiday, Joe stays in the room until everyone else has left hoping, as well as the audience, that Princess Ann will reappear. Joe and the audience painfully realize this may not be the typical happy ending that Hollywood usually promises. However, what’s so significant about this ending is that it teaches us that reality doesn’t always promise us the happy endings.  There are films in this genre that don’t always give the audience a false sense of hope. This film was realistic by how it shows that some fantasies aren’t always attainable.

  

Being Able to Relate to Ordinary People

On the contrary, maybe these romantic comedies don’t necessarily inflict false hope. In fact, maybe they give people hope in life by provide perpetual bliss. As Westly Morris questions, “Who are we without these movies?” Maybe this genre doesn’t provide us with false hope; as it’s the “only genre committed to letting relatively ordinary people — no capes, no spaceships, no infinite sequels — figure out how to deal meaningfully with another human being… they make you believe in the power of communion”(2).  In other words, Morris is claiming that romantic comedies are more than the expectations that we tend to develop about love. They allow us to be able to relate to others and their stories. Lost in Translation is a film that doesn’t fall into those expectations of love; however, it provides the audience with the ability to relate to one another. Roger Ebert claims the purpose of this film, “offers an experience in the exercise of empathy. The characters empathize with each other (that's what it's about), and we can empathize with them going through that process.” Thus, meaning that the purpose of this film isn’t to see Bob and Charlotte fall in love, but more so to connect with each other as they both are lonely in Tokyo. The two never ended up together although, the film focuses on the two characters creating a meaningful relationship as they both bond over feeling lonely. Lost in Translation allows the audience to see how ordinary people create meaningful relationships, thus providing perpetual bliss rather than false hope.

            Morris also explains that romantic comedies, “find something funny about loneliness, curiosity, attraction, intimacy, conflict and rapprochement” (2). What he means by this is the audience is able to relate by using a comedic approach. In Knocked Up, we discussed how there was a lack of romance but an emphasis on comedy. Ben and Alison weren’t the perfect couple that Hollywood typically illustrates. Ben a slacker, and Alison a stiver, don’t necessarily fall in love with each other. Although this film does allow us to find something funny about how the two are suppose try to make things work because they are polar opposites. This romantic comedy is not inflicting false hope, in fact it is showing reality. We the audience are able to relate to how this ordinary couple work to make a meaningful relationship for the future of their child.

Final Thoughts 

We as the audience watch romantic comedies and develop expectations that we want to bring into our personal lives. We want to fall in love, and we want the experience of falling in love to follow the same criteria that we are constantly being presented in these films. The genre attempts to shape and develop a working definition for what love is supposed to be. Although, do we have to expect that love at first sight it real and its attainable for everyone? Most people don’t fall in love at first sight and end up happily ever after, but this doesn’t mean that they never found or experienced love. The films in the genre also give false hope when portraying forgiveness. The films make it seem as if you could do anything to mess up in a relationship and still, in most cases, the woman, or sometimes male, will forgive you and you’ll still live happily ever after. I mean come on, if I found out a man my age slept with my mother there’s not a chance in the world, I would forgive him and run away with him. These films definitely bring in unrealistic fantasies. However, there are exceptions where a few of the films stray away from the fantasies. Even though, I am still conflicted on whether these films provide false hope and unrealistic expectations, I’ve approached the conclusion that it is reasonable to admit that these romantic comedies do give people hope in life by providing perpetual bliss.

This question of the impact that romantic comedies is complex and I’m not sure where I stand as there is really no definitive answer. I truly believe these films try to define love, to where the definition of love shouldn’t be restricted to one definition. Love can be many things and I believe these films restrict the meaning of love by creating boarders. If it’s one thing I’ve taken away is that my relationship doesn’t fall into the same patterns that are presented in this genre. Does that invalidate my relationship? Absolutely not. I do believe that these films aren’t just negative influences. Some of the films in the genre give people the ability to relate to ordinary people. They bring comedy to loneliness, curiosity, attraction, intimacy, conflict and rapprochement. Overall, we the audience need take accountability in becoming aware that some romantic comedies provide unrealistic fantasies so that we don’t feel dissatisfied with ourselves and the relationships we do have. If we believe that love doesn’t have boarders in its definition, then we won’t be dissatisfied when watching these fantasies and we may even find the importance of ordinary people creating meaningful relationships.