Romantic Comedies: The Dangers of Unrealistic Expectations from Pride and Prejudice to Love and Basketball (2000)

Natalia Rueda-Marshall

May 13, 2020

 Romantic Comedy 

Romantic Comedies: The Dangers of Unrealistic Expectations from Pride and Prejudice to Love and Basketball (2000)

Four months ago, my understanding of romantic comedies was that the films were largely feel-good movies that encompassed humor and a happy ending where the protagonists end up together. Four months later, I have realized that romantic comedies are far more complex than I gave them credit for and continue to change the norms of the genre. But, a constant that I have seen remain true is the effects of romantic comedies. Namely, romantic comedies are guilty of instilling unrealistic expectations of romantic relationships. They push the fantasy of a relationship with romantic gestures that can overcome many obstacles, that is sometimes paired up with a fantasy of a better life outside of their romantic relationship. These unrealistic expectations have been developed from romantic comedies ranging from Shakespeare’s Much Ado About Nothing with its enemies to lovers trope to Michael Showalter’s The Big Sick (2017) that shows how deceit, cultural expectations, and even illness can’t stop true love. Romantic comedies are guilty of making viewers expect the most of their partners and their relationships. 

One of the earlier examples of romantic comedy that we came across was Jane Austen’s “Pride and Prejudice.” The novel followed the unconventional (for her time in the 1800s) strong-willed Elizabeth Bennet and her developing relationship with the sophisticated Mr. Darcy who was a part of the landed gentry. The obstacles in the novel include family, social class, and as the title suggests, the pride and prejudices of both Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy. In the end, Elizabeth comes to realize Mr. Darcy’s true character after the discovery that in a selfless act, he handled the expense of her sister’s marriage and helped maintain her family’s honor. The novel ends with not only Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy married, but her sister Jane also finds true love with Mr. Bingley. This is all to say that the outcome Elizabeth received was the best-case scenario. Mr. Darcy could have given up on Elizabeth after her first not-so gentle rejection of him or after Lydia compromised the status of her family. But he remained uncompromising in his respect and love for Elizabeth. Mr. Darcy made sacrifices that upset his family and broke the standards of his social class all in a declaration for her. She ended with a happy marriage significantly wealthier than she was before, and even her family found happiness. It is understandable how readers could finish the novel with raised standards about what they want from a romance. 

One of the earlier films that we watched was the 1941 screwball The Lady Eve directed by Preston Sturges. In her book Romantic Comedy: Boy Meets Girl Genre, Tamar Jeffers McDonald reports “The term ‘adversarial sport’, with its connotation of competitive games, aptly describes the screwball attitude towards love: it is a game each combatant wants to win and is prepared to cheat in order to do so” (page 23). In The Lady Eve, the female lead Jean Harrington (Barbara Stanwyck) does just that. From her desire for wealth, the conwoman sets her sights on Charles Pike (Henry Fonda), heir to the Pike Ale fortune, but ends up falling in love with the man. But, when Charles becomes smart about her con, he leaves her, and she decides to retaliate by conning him again while messing with his head. This course of action encompasses two major themes of screwballs- roleplay and inversion of gender roles where Jean holds the power in their relationship. She lures Charles into falling in love with her as the Lady Eve Sidwich, and then drives him away on their honeymoon back into her arms as Jean. By the end of the film, Charles realizes what she knew all along; that they were meant to be together. After several acts of fraud later, Jean gets her man and the money she was after. Granted, this movie did not portray the ideal love story, but it still romanticized the idea of a perfect ending. It also made the idea of deceiving your partner admissible, because after all it was in the name of love. But how likely is it for someone to forgive you for the same thing twice? The film did not even include the reveal of Jean admitting to be Lady Eve, because there in all likelihood the average man would not have forgiven that. 

One particularly interesting romantic comedy is William Wyler’s Roman Holiday (1953). This film ups the ante on the fantasy rom coms can inspire by combining both royalty and romance. Princess Ann (Audrey Hepburn) is the Crown Princess yet she longs for more from her life where she is offered little freedom. She escapes her court embassy one night and is saved by reporter Joe Bradley (Gregory Peck), and so a love story to rival Cinderella and Prince Charming begins. Only this time the woman is royalty and she is not being saved from her evil stepmom but of an unfulfilling life. After rescuing the drugged-out woman, he later discovers she is actually the Crown Princess and his ticket to a big payday. So, this film unsurprisingly includes deception where Princess Ann pretends to be the ordinary Anya, and Joe pretends he does not really know the truth. However, Joe ends up truly caring for Ann and refuses to hand over the photos or write an article on her rebellious excursion. The final scene is when Joe goes to the Palace to reveal the truth to Ann and say his goodbye. The ending was unexpected as Ann and Joe do not end up together. They both accept the impossibility of them being together, and it's refreshing that the film doesn’t push the highly improbable yet expected ending. But the film still accomplishes to set high expectations without the happily ever after. When Joe decides not to go through with publishing his assignment and puts the wellbeing of Ann above his own, he sets a standard for romantic gestures. It shows complete selflessness and sacrifice as he jeopardized his job even though he knew he could never be with Ann. This serves to make viewers of Roman Holiday pine for romantic gestures to have their partner’s love proven even though it may come at an expense. 

In a relatively modern film, Mike Nichols’ Working Girl (1988) works as another example of film that raises expectations. This film follows the ambitious Tess McGill (Melanie Griffith) as she works to rise in ranks in the business world. Along the way she meets Jack Trainer (Harrison Ford) and finds that they work well together as both business and romantic partners. Like many romantic comedies, including those already discussed, this film has the feature of masquerade where Tess pretends to hold the same position as her boss to better her chance of getting her idea of a merger deal to succeed. Before this deception comes to light, Jack leaves Tess’s successful and beautiful boss because of his feelings for Tess. When her deception is exposed, there is a period of hurt, but ultimately Jack chooses Tess again. The film ends with Tess getting her man and her dream job. The film perpetuates the unhealthy notion that lying to your partner harbors no real consequences when forgiveness is inevitable. Working Girl is unique however, because there is a lot of emphasis on Tess’s life outside of romance specifically with her work and giving her the perfect ending in both her love and work life is problematic. The message of the film is that if you put the work in, eventually things will work out for your career and love life. Instilling the fantasy that having it all is possible, and you should not settle for less.

Taking a page from Working Girl, Love and Basketball (2000) as directed by Gina Prince-Bythwood also has a perfect resolution for Monica (Sanaa Lathan) and Quincy (Omar Epps). The progression of their relationship and the description of the film’s plot can best be described by Wesley Morris’s definition of the “drawbridge” in his essay Rom-Coms Were Corny and Retrograde. Why Do I Miss Them so Much? Morris explained the drawbridge concept as “It represents two even halves lowering themselves toward each other — by making admissions, revealing vulnerabilities, giving in to magnetism — until both sides meet in the middle, ready to go somewhere deeper together, somewhere the audience won’t see.” At the start of the film, we are introduced to young versions of Monica and Quincy where it is evident that they are equals in every way from their hardheaded personalities to their basketball skills. Their intimate relationship began in high school and carried over into college but came to an end when it was clear that they both needed character growth. Monica feared her mother’s fate as a complacent wife and gave more energy to basketball then her relationship, and Quincy’s only ambition was to impress his father by following in his footsteps. Monica’s admission was to give up basketball and reveal her enduring feelings in a moment of vulnerability. While Quincy’s admission was the lack of passion in his life that Monica could fill. Once both of their metaphorical bridges are lowered, we see a flash forward where Monica and Quincy are living their best lives together while Monica achieved her dream of playing in the WNBA. Much like the last film, Love and Basketball gave Monica a happily ever after. She got her man, and conveniently got on the WNBA team after having quit basketball for a desk job. The film completely glosses over Quincy breaking off his engagement sparing the audience from the pain his fiance must have felt. Which adds to the unrealistic expectation that life is easy when you find the person you belong with. The film presents a reality so desirable that anything less, would leave viewers dissatisfied with their lives and longing for more.

Some expectations of romantic comedies have changed as the years have gone by. Screwball romantic comedies brought more unpredictable characters and plots, while sex comedies welcomed an era of the decline of censorship by the Hay’s code. But romantic comedies have remained fairly consistent in their success of creating realities to be fantasized about. With their inclusion of romantic gestures, sacrifice, and perfect endings- standards for romantic relationships start to rise. It is not difficult to see how one would begin to expect, or at the very least want these things out their own relationship. But what happens when that type of perfection cannot be obtained? The assumption is dissatisfaction in your life that makes it seem like you were probably better off not watching romantic comedies to begin with. 

Work Cited

Austen, Jane, et al. Pride and Prejudice. W.W. Norton and Company, 2016.

Love and Basketball. Directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood, 40 Acres and a Mule Filmworks, 2000. 

McDonald Jeffers, Tamar. Romantic Comedy. New York, Columbia University Press, 2007. 

Morris, Wesley. “Rom-Coms Were Corny and Retrograde. Why Do I Miss Them so Much?” The New York Times, The New York Times, 24 Apr. 2019, www.nytimes.com/2019/04/24/magazine/romantic-comedy-movies.html.

Roman Holiday. Directed by William Wyler, Paramount Pictures, 1953.

The Lady Eve. Directed by Preston Sturges, Paramount Pictures, 1941.

Working Girl. Directed by Mike Nichols, 20th Century Fox, 1988.