The Graduate: Mrs. Robinson Wants What She Cannot Have by Lulu

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Professor Sinowitz

4/13/20

The Graduate: Mrs. Robinson Wants What She Cannot Have

Throughout Mike Nichols’ film, The Graduate (1967), there is definitely a different power dynamic that takes place that we have not seen before. These characters such as Benjamin (Dustin Hoffman), Mrs. Robinson (Anne Bancroft), and Elaine (Katharine Ross) appear to have our full attention as we try to understand what is going through their minds as this drama unfolds. As we know, Benjamin is anxious as he has just graduated from college and is trying to figure out his next move. While being forced to participate in his parent’s mature and adult world, Benjamin is reacquainted with his parent’s friends, such as the Robinsons. We get to know Mrs. Robinson fairly quickly as she brings us into her boring housewife environment. There is certainly a combination of loneliness and bitterness that Mrs. Robinson is enduring. This is due to the fact that their daughter Elaine is away at college but is returning home for the summer and Mr. Robinson pays no attention to his wife as well.  Mrs. Robinson is looking for something to fill this empty void and after noticing that Benjamin is out of college and uncertain of his future, Mrs. Robinson takes this as an opportunity to soak up Benjamin’s freedom and independence.  

Basically, Mrs. Robinson wants what she cannot have and that is the entity of Benjamin.  It is clear that he is nervous about his future now that he has graduated college. Although he has no obligations, his future is wide open, and these provide perfect excuses for Mrs. Robinson to take a hold of his youthfulness.  By seducing Benjamin, not only is she getting attention from someone that finds her attractive, but she is trying to have the same ability of not having to answer to anyone or be anywhere. This affair allows for Mrs. Robinson to thrive by trying to keep Benjamin for herself. This is the only thing that is keeping her satisfied in her personal life and she just assumes that this affair will go on for however long they can get away with it.  Mrs. Robinson does not want to surrender her power and possession over Benjamin because she enjoys taking a part of his freedom.  As we heard in the podcast between Professor Sinowitz and Professor Glausser, Mrs. Robinson could be compared to a vampire in this whole ordeal because she drains all of the youthfulness out of Benjamin’s normal life and is slowly turning him into a boring, miserable person like herself. 

By Mrs. Robinson having an affair, it is evident that this is a result of  her failing marriage. Rather than trying to fix what is wrong in her relationship with Mr. Robinson, she rebels against him by deciding to have this affair with Benjamin. Although it is not an ideal situation that she has gotten them all into, it has made her a more powerful, controlling, and confident person. This affair works out in her favor as Mr. Robinson and Elaine have no idea what is really happening behind closed doors. Mrs. Robinson is more than capable of pulling off this commanding presence over Benjamin while fooling her family. Although we know that this will not last long, Mrs. Robinson sacrifices her family in order to have things go her way just this once. 

Speaking of family, when Mr. Robinson keeps implying that Benjamin should take Elaine out, Benjamin complies even when Mrs. Robinson forbids him to do so. Anyone can see that this sensible set-up between Elaine and Benjamin infuriates Mrs Robinson in many ways. One reason being is that she knows it is morally wrong for her and Benjamin to be together, especially once others are made aware of their affair, they will become a laughing stock.  Another reason is that Mrs. Robinson is overtly jealous and furious over the  fact that  Elaine and Benjamin have the ability to be together in a casual, normal way unlike their affair. Furthermore, Mrs. Robinson is angry because Benjamin and Elaine are both young and have the future wide open to them. Mrs. Robinson also behaves more coldly toward Benjamin as he becomes distant to her because he is not tied down to anyone like she is. Also, by Benjamin pursuing Elaine, this is obviously leaving Mrs. Robinson powerless and lonely again. However, like this affair, Elaine and Ben’s relationship does not last long when Elaine finds out the truth about the affair. Elaine later gets involved with Carl Smith, but goes back to Benjamin despite knowing that their relationship will not go over well with her parents. However, that does not stop Benjamin from finally pursuing his own goals and getting out of Mrs. Robinson’s tangled web. Mrs. Robinson is still reeling on a path of even more destruction as she tries to control both Elaine and Ben’s futures. 

Mrs. Robinson has reached her breaking point as she no longer gets what she wants from Benjamin, but she has regained some stature as she tries to keep him and Elaine apart. We know that Elaine distances herself from Benjamin and she settles for Carl. With Elaine marrying Carl, this outcome satisfies Mrs. Robinson because she thinks that she has finally brought justice to the situation now that Benjamin cannot affect their lives anymore, but Benjamin swoops in at the last second to stop the wedding and successfully gets Elaine back. As they are fleeing the church, Mrs. Robinson aggressively yanks Elaine and shouts, “It’s too late!” to which Elaine  retorts, “Not for me!”. This response demonstrates just how Elaine is able to display her own dominance over her mother because she now possesses more power and autonomy which leaves Mrs. Robinson without any the power that she once had. 

Although Mrs. Robinson is portrayed as kind of an evil villain,  I feel sympathetic toward her. I think this is mainly due to the fact that she is stuck in a boring, loveless marriage and the only way that she is able to feel good about herself again is when she breaks the rules. While I cannot relate with Mrs. Robinson on a lot of the events that take place in this film, but I do know what it feels like to be ignored by those around me. I know that when I feel as if I am being ignored, I become confused, upset and I would want others to take notice. In a similar way, Mrs. Robinson feels sad and wants Benjamin to take notice of her and this causes her to want more and more of his time and attention. Basically, I thought that I could somewhat relate to Mrs. Robinson on an emotional level and I feel sorry for her because she loses all control in the end. Not only does she lose her own self-control but I also noticed that she is being pushed to the side even more toward the end of the film. More specifically, she is being pushed away by her family and the audience during the wedding ceremony scene because we can see her trying to appear as more powerful by telling Mr. Robinson and Elaine that Benjamin is too late, only to have her plans be foiled again.  So, I do feel sympathetic toward Mrs. Robinson solely because she is trapped in a loveless marriage, she is constantly being ignored by her family, and she is unable to attain the things in life that she is after. 

In the end, I do think that Mrs. Robinson got what she deserved after she took advantage of Benjamin for her own gain. Although she believed she could bask in some of Ben’s youth and independence, she just ended up hurting herself more as she further ruined her marriage and her relationship with Elaine. While she thought that this affair would work out in her favor, she ultimately ended up being right back where she started which was in a bitter,  lonely state of mind. Especially if Mr. and Mrs. Robinson would go through with getting a divorce, she will end up being figuratively and literally all alone again. Although, maybe being alone is just what she deserves. 

Works Cited: 

Nichols, Mike, Director.  The Graduate, Embassy Pictures, 1967 The Graduate, Amazon.com link

Sinowitz, Michael,  PodBean.com, Rom Com: Discussion of Mike Nichols’ The Graduate (1967) and McDonald’s “The Radical Romantic Comedy” , PodBean.com Podcast link